Are you feeling on edge?
Are  you getting upset easily?

FREE Download of 265 Activities to Reduce Emotional Vulnerability and Increase Resilience.

When we are vulnerable to our emotions, it can be difficult to think straight, make good decisions and feel good. We tend to be reactive and get upset more easily. We might get snappy with our children or find ourselves excessively complaining about others, feeling angry, resentful, and so on. This impacts on our mood and sense of wellbeing. It impacts on our relationships. Distressing emotions can also create body symptoms and exacerbate current illness and conditions.

There are many ways to reduce your vulnerability to emotions. Accumulating positive emotions and good feelings is just one way to help reduce vulnerability to emotions in the short term.

This free handout gives you plenty of ideas for activities (265 ideas) aimed to lift your spirits and improve your mood. Often when we feel low it can be hard to think of ways to improve our emotional state. Having this list at hand will help you pick an activity you enjoy and then you can take action that will give you a boost of feel good energy.

Remember to engage in the activity with mindfulness. Allow yourself the time to be fully present and enjoy yourself. Try not to zone out or worry about other things.

Oftentimes, particularly for women, we put the needs of others before our own, which takes time away from meeting our own needs. Consequently, activities we enjoy and need for our emotional and mental wellbeing can fall low on our priorities. This is understandable as we tend to have many commitments and demands and only a limited amount of time each day.

Try adding one positive activity into your daily routine, no matter how simple it may be, such as play music and dance or arrange some flowers in a vase. Chose something that brings your enjoyment, pleasure, calmness, love, confidence or peace.

You could plan something ahead of time, like coffee with a friend. Today, I bought some yarn to knit a simple snood. I haven’t knitted in years and I’m so looking forward to my little project.

Offered with love, Anna
FREE Download 265 ideas and activities

My teacher read this passage at the end of our intensive back in July for my Holistic Counselling and Psychotherapy course. It’s called an intensive for good reason. And when we are given our workload for the semester, it can be overwhelming, especially when there is so much happening in my life, other than my studies.

Goethe’s writing is a life line for me, because amongst all that has occurred this year, I have somehow managed to also fulfil the demands of my studies. I have not done this alone. I could not do this alone. I have been supported, encouraged, and helped by many, for which I am grateful.

The semester is not quite over yet and there is still work to be done, but I can see myself nearly there. Year One nearly complete.

It is often when you look back over your life that you can see how the forces of providence moved to help you achieve your goals. Ideas and dreams become focussed intentions, that manifest awareness of opportunity, inspire and motivate us to make decisions and to take action. Thus taking steady, strategic steps towards our goal, alongside the guidance, assistance, and happenings we could not have imagined possible. That is magical. That is powerful.

I wish you all well in going for and achieving your dreams. If you want some help getting started, feel stuck or are struggling with some uncertainty, let me know.

​Offered with Love, Anna

When we contemplate the big question - What is the purpose of Life?
We all say we want to be happy. We want to enjoy life more.

The Dalai Lama talks about happiness being the purpose of life. Whatever the greater meaning of life may be, we all wish for a happy life, free from suffering.

Over 2300 years ago, Aristotle concluded that more than anything, men and women seek happiness.

Happiness is important to people. There's no doubt about it. Universities worldwide have conducted research on the importance of happiness, and time and time again, happiness comes first.

Happiness is one of our most cherished goals. Have you taken the time lately to stop and reflect on what it is and how important it is to you?

Take a moment now to relax and think about what happiness means to you. And if you have time, fill a page in your journal or on a piece of paper, with all your definitions of happiness.

Your definition of happiness influences every significant decision in your life. 

During our women's circle we will reflect on happiness and do exercises on happiness. We'll talk about what it is and how to tune into joy, which has been defined as the soul of happiness. We'll also talk about the pursuit of happiness and why that always fails. You'll find out what may be blocking your happiness. And lots more.

Hope you can join us on 26th May. You're also welcome to resit the women's circle at a discounted rate. It is valuable to revisit the topics as it takes your healing and learning to another level. I will also be adding new content and exercises to the sessions.

Don't hesitate to contact me if you'd like more information.

Love, Anna

I recently completed training with the University of Melbourne to become a facilitator of their parenting program, Tuning In to Kids.™ This program focuses on using our children's emotions as an opportunity for connection and closeness. Parents teach their children the skills of emotional intelligence, problem solving and setting limits where required. 

In a nutshell, this program teaches parents to be emotionally responsive to their children as well as helping them understand and manage their own emotions.

This training got me thinking about my own childhood and how my parents raised me. Emotional development wasn't really on the agenda. Of course, they were doing their best. As we all do, given the resources we have at the time. However, looking back on my upbringing, I realise it taught me so much about the importance of understanding emotions.

Some of you would have been raised within the strict discipline model as a path to good behaviour, others would have had experiences of their emotions being dismissed and glossed over. Perhaps your parents used food or other distractions. Some parents can be disapproving of their children's emotions. Perhaps you were criticised for having an emotion like fear. You may have been told to "stop being silly, there are no monsters under the bed." You may have been constantly corrected or even punished for expressing a particular emotion. Or you may have been allowed to express your emotions yet not have had boundaries set or help with understanding your emotions and how to deal with them.

These early experiences in childhood lead us to form certain attitudes about emotions. As adults, it helps to become aware of our beliefs about emotions, what we think and feel about our emotions. Psychologists call this meta-emotion. The emotions we have about our own emotions. We often judge ourselves for expressing certain emotions.  For example, a friend of mine was feeling upset and burst into tears. She immediately began trying to contain her emotions, excuse them and apologised to me for crying.

What do you believe about emotions? Some emotions, like happiness and laughter may be acceptable to you, whilst anger is something you have to hide and act like everything is fine. Crying may be something you do in private, or a sign of weakness.
​
Our beliefs form part of our subconscious mind, creating unconscious emotional and behavioural patterns that are played out. These patterns can hold us back and keep us stuck. 

Some of the words you may remember hearing when you were a child, in relation to sadness and crying, include: "That's not something to cry about." Or the popular, "Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about." The demeaning tease, "Don't be a cry baby." Or "Stop crying like a girl." Even the warmly spoken "Don't cry my darling, have a cookie," sends a message that crying is not okay.

Embracing your emotions can change your life.  Five tips I recommend as a beginning point are:

1. Have deep compassion for yourself in regards to all your emotions.
2. Love yourself through whatever emotions arise within your daily life and the challenges you face.
3. Accept every part of yourself, even the parts that you judge and criticise.
4. Reframe the meaning of a situation in a way that is beneficial to your experience and personal growth.
5. Consider how your emotions are drawing something important to your attention. 

This poem by Rumi shows a way to be with our emotions which are after all part of our humanity.

The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
Some momentary awareness comes
As an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
Who violently sweep your house
Empty of its furniture.
Still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
For some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
Meet them at the door laughing,
And invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
Because each has been sent
As a guide from beyond.

RUMI

Women's Circle starting soon. Email Anna if you'd like to join us, for more info or if you'd like a private session.

Love, Anna

Today I’ve been reading Marianne Williamson’s book, Illuminata. I randomly opened the book at the chapter Washing Us Clean.

Sometimes we keep our dark parts hidden. And we do this for many reasons such as fear of being judged, feeling inadequate or ashamed. In truth no one is judging you.

Marianne Williamson says God wishes to heal you, not punish you. You only punish yourself by keeping your darkness hidden. Use the prayer at the end of this post to open up to Divine love and healing.

Sometimes we think we’re f***ed up and need hours or years of therapy or that we are damaged goods. But that is denying God’s healing power and ability to rewire our souls at their deepest level. Therapy is important and it helps but you more than your psychology.

Instead of trying to hide your faults and shortcomings, give them over to God. Ask God to heal you and miracles will happen. God’s healing is instant and comes in the form of wisdom if you are willing to hear it.

Remember to have a lot of self compassion when looking at your faults, shortcomings, limitations, mistakes you’ve made, disappointments and frustrations. It’s part of the human condition, and we are all in the same boat.

Be kind and understanding when confronted with your personal failings. You’re not meant to be perfect! So, don’t berate yourself and beat yourself up for being human. Show compassion towards yourself. Surrender to God and allow the healing and insight, wisdom and personal growth.

Here is Marianne’s Prayer for Washing Us Clean.
​
Dear God/Divine/Universe/Creator,
I want so much to be the person You would have me be.
There are so many places in my life where I still hide from You, where I deny my love.
In this moment I surrender those places to You.
Please heal me, God.
I know that I: (use these or say your own)

• make it hard for other people to get close to me
• withhold my forgiveness
• hold prejudices against certain people
• am mean to some people
• gossip
• lie
• cheat
• play small
• steal or violate
• manipulate
• hold resentments
• take people and situations for granted
• (add your own)

Turn my darkness, dear God, into Light.
May I become Your Self within me.
Illumine my heart.
Increase my understanding.
May my footsteps go where You would have them go, and my actions be what You would have them be.
Dear God, please make me new.
Amen.

I remember going through a very difficult time in my late 20s and believing that life had dealt me a bad hand.

I smile now when I look back at how fatalistic I was.

I have a lot of love and compassion for my younger self.  Back then I didn’t realise how I was unwittingly participating in creating my situation.

Once we become aware of our thoughts and emotional patterns, our beliefs and attitude, we can choose whether to keep them or change them. Easy said, sometimes harder to do.

By building our awareness, bringing our automatic patterns into the light and into the conscious mind, we can begin to create positive changes.

It helps to get to know the forces within that rule us. To view those forces with love, and curiosity. You don’t have to wait to look back with amusement and affection at your younger self. You can be that detached observer of your patterns right now. This will help you when you are facing your difficult times.
 
Whatever area of your life you want to focus on, (such as a dysfunctional relationship) you will find the keys within the vast territory of your unconscious mind. Identifying and understanding this can guide you to dissolve the patterns that have lead you towards the actions that created the very situation you do not want.

By following your inner wisdom, you can work towards creating new thought patterns that will bring positive changes into your life.

You don't have to wait until life forces you out on a limb or things fall apart. What area of your life is creating the most pressing issues for you right now? Is it your relationship, work, living space, spirituality, emotional health, physical health, family or friends, finances, self worth, assertiveness ability or self care?

Love,
Anna Rawlings

I was a preschool director in the snowy mountain region when I had my first baby. During my maternity leave, parents would approach me when I was out and about, and seek information or reassurance about various aspects of their child’s development or behaviour.

I had been seeking something I enjoyed that would provide intellectual stimulation for me while I was a new mum, and these parent interactions, provided the inspiration to write parenting and child development articles.

My first article was published in a national magazine. I was proud of this accomplishment and continued writing. Some of my topics included language development and toddler displacement when a new baby arrives.

I started attending a church playgroup and offered the co-ordinator my spare copies of the magazines.  It turned out that this person was a journalist and she wanted to quit. Soon after, she offered me her job as the local correspondent for a nearby large town newspaper.

I didn’t want the job. I politely said I’d think about it.

I mentioned this happening to my old school friend, Serina, and she said opportunities like this do not exist in Sydney. University trained journalists leave Sydney to go to country towns to get work on local papers. She opened my eyes to this opportunity and encouraged me to go for it.

The editor of the paper asked me to write a feature for a major national event in our small town, for which I interviewed many people and spent several more hours writing and choosing the best photos. The feature was accepted. I was offered a job and I negotiated a fully-fledged journalist pay rate. I remember an acquaintance congratulated me on my feature and commented on it having a “by line” which at that time, I wasn't aware of the significance.

It was the perfect job for me. I didn’t realise that I would enjoy it so much.  With my toddler in-tow, we covered local events, gallery openings, hospital openings, conducted interviews while he played on the floor, reported on political events and farming issues.

And this is how my heart-felt intention for intellectual stimulation, with the grace of the Divine, landed me a job as a freelance journo, and got me started on a new adventure that ultimately helped me balance my life as a new mother.

With Love,
Anna
annarawlings.com

Weekend Workshop 14 & 15 May 2016
Heal Your Life - Achieve Your Dreams 
This workshop was created by Louise Hay herself. Anna Rawlings is a certified workshop leader and life coach, licensed and authorised by Louise Hay to facilitate this workshop. For more details on this workshop click here.
EARLY BIRD DISCOUNT Deposit Required by May 3

We all know someone who loves life. Someone for whom things just seem to work out well. Someone with an abundance of joy, money and friends. They are loved, have support, people help them. Opportunities seem to come their way, things fall into place and good things just happen for them?

The truth is that the Law of Attraction operates the same for all of us. Your attitude is the vibe you emanate. And the Law of Attraction states that like attracts like. Accordingly, it is your attitude that is drawing your life experiences to you.

So then, how does the Law of Attraction work?

We have thousands of thoughts a day! Scientists calculate up to 90,000 thoughts per day.

Everything we say to ourselves is an affirmation (whether it is positive or negative). Our thoughts, repeated and given the energy of emotion, are creative and therefore create our life experiences.

Your subconscious mind cannot tell the difference between what is real and what is imagined. The more you repeat a thought, it will create an imprint in your subconscious mind. Once in your subconscious mind, it attracts to you the people, circumstances, opportunities and experiences that match the images you have created within. Therefore, you can actually program your subconscious mind. You have the power to influence and direct your experiences and thus to create your life by consciously choosing your thoughts.

We are all creative whether we are conscious of it or not. However, it doesn't mean that you can wish for a Maserati and presto, next morning you have miraculously manifested the car of your dreams in your driveway.

If someone has a belief that they are unlucky in love, then they will subconsciously create that reality. They can say all the positive affirmations under the sun, but if the affirmations are in conflict with their beliefs, the affirmations just won't work. The ego likes to be right, so the person will subconsciously either be attracted to the “wrong” type of partner or they will subconsciously sabotage the relationship until they are in a situation where they get to say once again “I’m so unlucky in Love, I always get hurt, men leave me, or  why can’t I find someone to love me for who I am.” Until you release your deep seated limiting beliefs, the pattern repeats, relationship after relationship.

Awareness is the first step. Becoming aware of your thoughts and deep seated beliefs. Becoming aware of how they are operating to generate your emotions and ultimately, your life experiences.

If you would like to learn more about how to identify the beliefs that may be limiting you and how to use affirmations to enhance the Law of Attraction to create a life you dream of, contact me to arrange a private consultation either by skype or in person.

Love, Anna
 
PS
If you have identified "Everybody leaves me" as a negative belief about love and intimacy, here’s an affirmation that may help: “I now create a long-lasting, loving, respectful, and fulfilling relationship.”

Join us for the Heal Your Life - Achieve Your Dreams Weekend Workshop being held for the first time in South West Rocks in May 2016. This workshop was created by Louise Hay herself. Anna Rawlings is a certified workshop leader and life coach, licensed and authorised by Louise Hay to facilitate this workshop. For more details on this workshop click here.

​annarawlings.com

We all say we want to be happy and enjoy life more. The Dalai Lama tells us that the purpose of life is to be happy and free from suffering. So what is stopping us from experiencing more joy?

When I asked my 7 year old son "What is the purpose of life?" he answered "So you can play, so you can have fun and so you can be happy." God, I love him!

So what does self compassion have to do with being happy, you ask? Here are some things to consider.

Notice you are suffering.
To begin with, you have to become aware that you are suffering and acknowledge that you are experiencing some difficulty, stress or pain. 

Practise self kindness.
Allowing your feelings to surface will give you a clue as to how to respond to your pain. Self compassion is much the same as having compassion for someone else. Just as you would do for a friend, you tune into their pain and offer understanding, kindness and comfort. You can also display this empathy for yourself.

Understanding cannot exist alongside judgement.
It is not helpful to judge or criticise yourself nor to just soldier on, ignoring your pain and stress. Release any judgement and don’t give yourself a hard time about your situation. Try not to listen to your inner critic that has the habit of berating you and expecting you to be perfect. The truth is nobody is perfect.

Honour and accept your humanness.
An important thing to realise is that we are all human and we are all in the same boat experiencing similar struggles. Our humanness connects us to one another because we understand that our failings, limitations, shortcomings, mistakes and inadequacies are part of the shared human experience. It is a comfort and relief to know that we are not alone in our suffering. If, for example, you are feeling embarrassed about your behaviour, you could tell yourself “lots of people would have reacted the same way under those circumstances, next time I will handle the situation differently.”

Use your experience to grow.
The more we can accept ourselves and our humanness, the more we can have compassion for ourselves. In the spirit of loving kindness we can learn from our mistakes, discover new coping skills, learn to create boundaries with others and so forth as required. As we learn to better handle life’s ups and downs, we can be secure in the knowledge that we are here to support and encourage ourselves.

Take a moment to comfort yourself.
Does this sound familiar? When your child is sick, you immediately take action to solve the problem. You make phone calls, reschedule your day, change appointments, clean up vomit and soothe your sick child. How often do you stop and think - “This is stressful and I need some comforting. I’m worried about my child, I feel disappointed because I had an important meeting today, I’m stressed that I am going to miss a deadline and this will impact others.” We tend to forget about the impact on ourselves when we experience a setback and that we can actually take a moment to give ourselves the understanding and support we need.

Your true nature is joy.
To be more joyful, we tune into our inner world, where joy and happiness reside. Self compassion is a key pathway to joy. When you are more loving towards yourself, this connects you to your true nature, and within that is joy and happiness. 

Women's Group starting soon in South West Rocks.
Experience the shared wisdom of our Women’s Group and create the life you want through practising self-care and self-compassion. Together we share our journey and experiences, with some laughter and the occasional tears, knowing we are being supported to make gentle changes that will enrich our lives and relationships. For more details click here. 

Freebie 
Click here to download a simple but powerful process to release self judgement.